There’s a reason why your mum always told you not to stay up late. Because the longer you stay awake, the more money you’re going to spend by being a consumer.

Remember Citibank’s “The City Never Sleeps” tagline? It suggests that Citibank will serve its cardholders round-the-clock. But that’s not all. It also says why sleep when you can stay up and do all sorts of fun things with your credit card all night long. It made not sleeping cool, and getting into debt hip.

Skip the RedBull and get some sleep, dude!

Even new products – like RedBull – were introduced to cash-in on the Sleep-Less phenomenon that swept across the cities of the world. Now there are probably hundreds of sleep-depriving. caffeine-loaded  drinks that are discreetly labelled as ‘energy drinks’.

The recreating, eating, shopping, partying and what-have-you till the wee hours of the morning presented businesses with a goldmine. The less we consumers sleep, the more money businesses make.

So it this just a case of businesses meeting consumer demands or is your friendly neighbourhood 24-hour mamak stall taking advantage of your insomnia?

Fine, we all could do with a midnight snack once in a while. But what about 24-hour gyms? Are people seriously pumping iron at 4 in the morning? Lately, hypermarkets have started extending their operation hours to 1am. Do we really have that urgent of a need for potato bread at that hour?

And that’s why they say “don’t sleep on it”, because if you do, then you are going to miss out of the bargain, deal or offer.

Sleeping consumers are no good because they not only can’t be sold to, but also can’t be advertised to.

But I’d rather my consumer have a good night’s sleep so that I am not selling to a groggy, sleep-deprived person with an attention span of a wasp.

So go to sleep guys and wake up refreshed to another day of buying or selling; whichever it is that you do.

When it comes to marketing, doing what everyone else is doing is a recipe for disaster. So screw what everyone else is doing if you want to stand out from all the monotonous clutter out there.

Yes, granted, sometimes copycat marketing works. But doing so will only get you a share of an existing pie but will not make you your own pie. If you’re saying what your competitors are already saying, then you are just another business saying the same old shit in the eyes of the consumer.  There’s no strong reason for consumers to buy from you, and only you.

Copycat marketing is as old and battered as the Roman Colosseum

It’s quite common where something printed, that was on air or seen online is made as a basis for drafting your own communications. I mean it is okay to emulate, but never imitate. A few examples:

1. If you’re selling energy drinks: instead of saying “gives you energy” say “makes others lazy”

2. If you’re selling cars: instead of saying “travel in comfort” say “it’s like you never left home”

3. If you’re selling pizzas: instead of saying “the best-tasting pizza” say “tastes like a real pizza”

4. If you’re selling beers: instead  of saying “refreshing, satisfying brew” say “never satisfying, if you stop at one”

5. If you’re selling handmade cookies: instead of saying “handmade every step of the way” say “machine-hating cookies”

Let’s face it. If you’re selling something, chances are someone else is selling pretty much the same thing too. Anything opposite of what your competitor is saying, something that evokes a little curiosity or perhaps adds on to what is already being said is good to go.

All the better if your product has that one Unique Selling Proposition (USP) that none of your competitors can’t live up to. But that’s a product issue, which goes to reiterate the fact that even the best marketing can’t sell a lousy product.

And don’t be afraid to change up when it’s not working; at least you won’t be called a failed copycat.

“I’ll quit drinking the day they sell whisky in a can!”. Nop, I didn’t say that. I just wish someone I knew had because I would want to give him or her an application for Alcoholics Anonymous.

Whisky in a can: genius or gross?

Presenting the little whisky that said I think I can. And into a can it went thanks to a Panama-based company which came up with this brilliant idea. Here are some quick facts, according to the makers:

• Outdoor drinkers would prefer to crack open a tin rather than lug a bottle. Errmmm… outdoor drinkers where art thou?

• The company retains an office in Glasgow, Scotland; but the stuff is made in Panama. Hey it’s like Apple’s “Designed in California, Assembled in China” tag… real classy!

• The can is a perfect size to be shared between 3 people who can mix it with other things like cola. Oh-my-gosh… cola! Why didn’t I think of that?

• It’s lightweight and portable and entirely recyclable. Hmmmm… that sounds strangely like the features of bottles too

• It’s going to be a part of every lifestyle and occasion. Did they lift the copy off a Keropok Udang pack? Damn!

Nothing like a vino that came from a box...

Some things are just wrong. But then again who are we to judge? Some dude out there decided to package wine in tetra packs and I don’t see too many people complaining. If this ingenuous packaging works, we could one day find the finest scotches in convenient 325ml cans.

Now I wonder if the beer boys will contemplate packaging in plastic sachets just to show they can be innovative too. But just kill me before that happens.

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